Monday, March 10, 2008
have you ever felt like you're going through karma? the things that i've done to people that i thought doesn't matter much back then suddenly became important when it's happening to me. i was just talking about alzheimer with a good friend of mine and i felt like it's a good thing. sounded weird, but true. there's so many things that i would rather forget. i know i sounded very depressing now but there's really nothing much in my life that is beautiful and significant enough worth remembering. alzheimer is like living a new life day after day. wouldn't it be great? something fun would still be fun even if you do it repetitively everyday. one day you're hurt, the next it's like it has never happened before. since i don't have alzheimer, so i have to go un-depress myself now.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
self-inflicted pressure, that's the kind of pressure that i'm having now. sadly but true, i imposed tons and tons of pressure onto my helpless body and mind and felt like there's nothing that i could do about it. thus, my body and mind is on full speed treadmill trying to keep up with the tight schedule and expectations that i've set for them. what's worst is that i didnt even realize that until Mr. X told me that through the phone. i seriously need to do something about it before lines start to appear across my face and eye-bags start to make me feel miserable. therefore, i declare this beautiful Sunday to be my "not-doing-anything" day! put the treadmill on hold before having to continue running tomorrow; set the speed to be at most medium at all time; take a break every now and then to see that there is life apart from working; go out with my friends and do more crazy stuff to remind myself that there's a bigger reason to why i am alive.
now, i need to clear my head and dream about beautiful things in my sleep. my second one for today =)